ALIVE

If you read my last post, I mentioned that I hosted a candidate on a "ride along" last Friday.  As these work trips usually go, the potential employee usually asks questions about the role, trying to gain nuggets on the products, insights on customer concerns, and what the day to day looks like.  Often these individuals are jotting down notes into their journals (they better be!), formulating a plan to knock out their final interview, while putting their best foot forward in hopes that I sing their praises to the hiring manager.

On this particular day, at least for most of it, it went as usual...visiting accounts, doing my thing, answering questions, explaining the industry, etc. etc.  But this time, the candidate, let's call her Stacy asked me a great question.  She asked, "If there is one thing I need to know...one piece of advice you can give me to crush this job, what is it?"

I thought about it for a second, while driving past the old battle ships nestled in the waters of Bremerton, Washington.  I pondered the question, thinking of the right response that would genuinely help her.  The standard answer would be to set goals, create a solid plan and execute, work really hard, bring value, and ask for the business.  Deep down I felt that response would be just like those old war vessels...rusty and out dated.

Well for some reason that day was different.  For those of you who have been following my blog have witnessed a dramatic shift in my mindset that I'm trying to share.  This blog has fostered an intellectual journey that has been one of the most transformational forces in my life.  It has taught me a powerful emotion called humility.  The process of sharing my thoughts, research, opinions, and strategies has been truly rewarding.  I have learned that I don't have to create, just document my journey.  Using concepts from Carol Dweck's book, Mindset: A New Psychology of Success, I'm working on developing a growth mindset - focusing on the process, learning, and growing - not simply on outcomes and the black and whiteness of wins an losses.  For most of my life I was living in a fixed mindset - gaining my self worth and validation on proving that I was good enough - to myself and others.

Trust me, I'm still a work in progress, but this time, when asked for advice on succeeding, I wanted to share something different.  I simply told Stacy:

Just know that you are alive
YOU ARE ALIVE!

To the average innocent bystander, one would think, man this dude is corny and definitely on the cheesy side.  You know what, I really don't care.  I wanted her to know and you to know that you are ALIVE!  Take advantage of this precious gift of having the freedom of being present, here alive today.  To think.  To act and do whatever it is that you want.   

Most people wake up each day and take for granted all the possibilities being alive has to offer...seriously.  Why do people wait to go through a traumatic event or threat of loss to truly appreciate how insanely lucky we are to experience just a single day and all the possibilities and wonders each day brings...especially in the mundane things that aren't given a second thought once they've passed?  Don't make a loss make you finally live. 

Kendra and my WORLD.

We take for granted the small things...which really are the BEST THINGS.  Get ready for my random list of examples: 

Hearing a child's laughter; going on a walk and feeling the wind in your face; a grilled cheese sandwich with bacon (what can I say, I love cheese...and bacon for that matter); going to the movies, reading a good book; smelling a scent that takes you back; experiencing the sunrise on a morning run; waking up on a Saturday morning to College Gameday; picking raspberries with your kids; physical touch from a loved one...the list can go on and on. 

How would you live your life if you knew you only had 6 months to live?  Would that change how you thought, acted, lived and loved?  What would you appreciate more if you just got out of jail after being locked up for 20 years?  I had the opportunity to play softball a few years ago against federal inmates and spoke to one of my former classmates who had 10 more years to serve.  Wow, the freedoms we have if you change your lens are so immense and beautiful, but are we living with that perspective and gratitude?

Living today, right now, I truly feel blessed...blessed and trying to do as much as I can while I'm here.  Sometimes I feel like John Mayer when he sings in his song, "Stop This Train"...so I play the numbers game, to find a way to say my life has just begun. If I do the math, I have about 64% of life left...and that's if I live to be 100. This is a long winded way of telling the candidate in my car, to you, and to remind myself that if you are reading this:

YOU ARE ALIVE, 
BUT ARE YOU TRULY LIVING?

We only get ONE SHOT at life.  This is me pleading with you (and to myself) to do a few things right now:

• Love more, judge less

• Laugh at yourself, not at others

• Cry tears of joy
• Think daily and independently 

• See beauty in all things

• Find gratitude in even hardships and set backs

• Ask yourself this question at the end of each day, "How many people did I help?"

• Know that you are only limited by your thoughts

• You can do and be anything you want - it all starts and ends in your mind

• Be generous

• Forgiveness transcends
• Know these words and use them often: Please and Thank you

• Fight the battle ahead, not the one behind you

• Plan for the future, but be present today

• Lastly, believe in yourself. You are special. You are a miracle. Since you are a miracle, make and recognize mini miracles daily. 

• Oh, and know that God loves you just the way you are, so just be yourself. 

Live the life you dream about.  Do not wait for an event to cause this.  Make this powerful choice now.

Happiness is not about money, but moments.  Fulfillment isn't found in status, but service.  Joy is not achieved by acquiring things, but in harnessing the power of thankfulness.  This approach is my best practice. This is my advice. I hope that you and Stacy from my ride along takes it, run with it, and never look back.

THE BIG 6

Last Friday (and an Ice Cube movie) I was working with a candidate that was doing a Ride Along (another Ice Cube movie...Ice Cube is my spirit animal) with me.  This isn't too uncommon...I am a sales trainer as well as a Territory Manager and often ride with and train new employees.  This particular case was an individual who was doing a "day in the life" of what we do.  This candidate was pretty far into the interview process and this ride along is usually one of the last steps.  These field rides are also an opportunity for me to get a feel if this person is a good fit for our company and has what it takes to succeed in medical sales - specifically in our division.  I am tasked to give my recommendation to the manager and other members of the leadership team.

I envision my ride along's like this...I'm obviously Ice Cube (one bad mofo)

 When I work with candidates I'm looking at specific traits in a short amount of time.  I try to uncover these behaviors and skill sets through questioning and basic interaction throughout the day.  If the candidate can demonstrate these traits, they are in.  If they can't, they're out.

Here is what I call my Big 6:

1. WORK ETHIC/DRIVE: Do they have an extremely strong work ethic and drive to be the best?
2. INTELLIGENCE: Are they smart?
3. GRIT: How do they deal with failure...are they resilient?
4. VALUES: Do they operate with sound ethics and good manners?
5. ENTHUSIASM: Are they passionate or passive? 
6. CULTURE: Does their personality fit within our organization?

In baseball, scouts, general managers, and personnel people are looking for what they call a "5 Tool Player."  These players are very rare and are coveted by organizations.  Basically, having the 5 tools means, you are a complete player...you can do it all: run with speed, excellent defensively, have a strong arm, hit for average, and hit for power.  Scouts must rely on their experience, eye for talent, and often "gut," on these players who are unproven at the professional level.  They have to project whether or not they have what it takes to make it to the "Show."  These scouts grade potential draftees on these 5 tools.  They would say for example, "He's a 4 tool guy...he does everything well, but can't hit for power (lacking that one tool)."

Mike Trout is as the model of a 5 Tool player - he can do everything on the baseball field very well.

I apply this same approach in projecting what kind of sales professional and person this candidate will be.  I evaluate whether or not they have what it takes to be a key contributor AND be a President's Club type representative.  That's always the hope.  I believe that if a candidate has the Big 6, I don't care what their sales background is, we can teach them how to sell our products and services and they will have success.

If this is you, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!

This might be a good time to evaluate your Big 6.  Are you a 3 Tool player or a 6 Tool player?  Is it time to revisit your fundamentals and get back to the basics?  Do you need to remind yourself why you took the job in the first place?  Sometimes we can get comfortable and get into modes where we are on cruise control.  I know you've heard of Beast Mode...attacking each day and challenge at work with zest and zeal (like how Marshawn Lynch attacked a defense).  I hope for your sake you are not in Least Mode...getting the least out of your skills, while your employer is getting the least out of your position.  Sometimes in life, we need to ask the right questions.  Here are a few for you to think about:

• How is your work ethic?  Are you still busting your ass, and giving maximum effort every day to be the best you can be?
• What are you doing to improve your skill sets and knowledge within your position?  
• How is your personal development outside your role (maybe for a position you want to ascend to)?  
• How do you deal with change and adversity in the work place...how's your grit?  
• Are you living by your core values on the job and treating others with respect and generosity?
• Are you living each day with passion and enthusiasm?  
• Do you love what you do?  
• Do you enjoy the people you work with?  
• Do you get satisfaction hanging and being around your coworkers?  
• Does your job give you energy or take it away?

WORK BY THE NUMBERS:
5% - current unemployment rate, thus,
95% of Americans are working
55% of our day (M-F) is spent at work (based on 7.7 hours of sleep)
30% of our life is spent at work
38% of men work over 50 hours per week
15% of women work over 50 hours per week (that number was 5% in 1979)
1800 - hours Americans work per year
$15.7 trillion - American Gross Domestic Product (GDP as of 2012)
$8.3 trillion - China's GDP in 2012 - our closest competitor

Seriously, take a moment and evaluate yourself, your position, your job, and your company right now.  I'd like to hope that for you, money isn't the only thing that determines your career and current role.  Life is too short!  Please don't simply survive Monday through Friday.  

My hope is that you THRIVE in your profession...that you wake up each day feeling blessed and so excited to go to work!  

If you are not 6 for 6 in my BIG 6, how can you improve that?  Remember a few posts ago, I mentioned the power of the Kohler Effect?...how working in groups or with others makes you put forth more effort.  I hope that you love the people you work with.  At my company, the people and the relationships I have with my colleagues is the most enjoyable piece of what I do.  I can honestly say that I LOVE THEM!  Life is all about relationships.  Quality relationships at home and in the workplace are vital for personal fulfillment.  I hope you feel the same.  If not, it might be time to re-evaluate your role.  Most people spend as much time with co-workers as family.  Find a job that fills you up, where you wake up on Monday PUMPED, because you get to go to work.  Find a company culture and a role that PLAYS TO YOUR STRENGTHS!  Do what you are good at and love to do.  Again, life is TOO SHORT to simply tolerate or worse yet, hate your job!!!

Growth and contribution bring ultimate satisfaction.  Finding the right career will do just that.  If you love your job, company, and current role - great.  If not, what can you do about it?  Time is ticking...don't waste a single day not progressing personally and professionally.  Being the best version of you means you are doing what you love to do and absolutely crushing it.  Let's GOOOO!  If you are in this place, continue that path.  If you are not, make the changes necessary to be there.  YOU CAN DO IT!!!

CPW

CPW...learn this acronym.  Know it's ways.  Trust it's power.  So what is CPW you might ask?  Well, its an approach to fashion that took me into my 30's to understand, appreciate, and apply.  CPW stands for: Cost Per Wear.

Given $200 and the task to expand my wardrobe, the younger me would either go to Target or Old Navy and buy several lower cost (and lower quality) garments.  I guess I used to walk out of these shopping experiences feeling stoked that I just scored a major wardrobe update.  My mindset at the time was quantity over quality.

Well, now that I am much older and wiser...and who's kidding, my wife Kendra has rubbed a lot off on me...I see more value in having fewer clothes, but higher quality.  Having a few staples in your closet that might cost more, but last longer and make you feel good is my new approach.  Looks are not everything, but liking how your clothes fit and loving how they look - at least for me - makes all the difference.

LOOK GOOD. FEEL GOOD. PLAY GOOD.

With that said...let me introduce you to a staple of mine that has been a go to for several years.  Fellas, listen.  Ladies, take notes for your man.  Its another acronym...they are called the ABC pant from Lululemon.  ABC stands for Anti Ball Crushing...seriously, that's what they are called.  Nothing wrong with letting the boys breathe a little.

This dude looks like he's thinking, "I wear, therefor I am, awesomeness."

Here's why I like them:

1. Lulu hems and tailor's them for free (yes!).  Guys, having your pants bunched up at the bottom is not a good look...maybe back in 1994 when grunge and gangster rap was all the fashion rage.  Take your pant game to the next level and have them tailored.
2. They don't wrinkle!  Awesome when I have to travel...just throw them in my bag and I'm good to go...no ironing necessary!
3. You can wash and dry them!  No dry cleaning bill.  This is so convenient and actually saves you money in the long run.
4. They are versatile!  Dress them up or dress them down.  Wear them with Vans or Chucks...or throw on a sport jacket with a pair of Cole Haan's and you are ready to close the deal in your afternoon meeting!
5. Last but definitely most important...they have 4-way stretch material!  Being in outside sales and getting in and out of my car frequently, driving, and flying...comfort and durability is HUGE...these babies are the most comfortable pants I have ever worn.  I can do squats in these pants no prob!  

The price is $128 and worth every penny.  I am not lying...I've converted about half of the guys in my division at my company to the ABC's...once you try them on, there's no going back!  Invest in your look...feel good...get value out of your purchase...buy clothes that last and look great...you deserve it!

Please, don't be that guy.

My other favorite pants are Zanerobe.  They also have 4-way stretch, they are a little more on the skinnier side (if you are looking for more of a trendy look), you can wash and dry them, they have plenty of room in the crotch (hee hee...ode to MJ) and my favorite part...they have a draw string!...no belt needed.  Love these when I'm going through security at the airport.  Zanerobe's are great to wear with an untucked shirt...dress them up or dress them down just like the ABC pant.  They come in a few different styles and retail for about $119 or less.

Here I'm rocking my black Zanerobe's...look like pants, feel like sweats.

Ladies, remember when 7 For All Mankind Jeans came out and completely changed the game for you...your comfort, your style, and most importantly, your butt!  After that, normal denim jeans just wouldn't cut it.  The thought!...jeans that cost over $100?...now it seems, they must cost over $200 to even be in the game.  Well, these ABC and Zanerobe pants are that kind of a game changer for guys.  You justified to yourself to spend that kind of money on jeans, but you felt GREAT!

Fellas, trust me, once you buy a pair and wear them, its like when Neo from the Matrix swallowed that pill...EVERYTHING CHANGED.  I actually wear less and less jeans now because of these pants.

Dudes before and after the ABC and Zanerobe pant.

Now when our money is spent at Target...its because Kendra spends it on a bunch of...aah umm...random SHIT for the house!...do we really need another candle or that apple cider dish soap?!

Part of being the best version of you includes loving how you look.  Find what works for you and rock it!  Remember, just be you...everyone else is taken..but if you're a guy, the ABC & Zanerobe pants might need to be a new staple.  Finally, understanding what CPW is all about and rethinking how you invest in your closet and YOU...is a step in the right direction!

SPECIAL EFFECTS

These techniques, strategies, and EFFECTS will create an explosion of good in your life.

So I downloaded an audiobook by Martin Meadows called Confidence: How to Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs and Achieve Your Goals. Martin's books are short, to the point, and give a fantastic foundational overview of several themes dealing with mastering your mindset.  I pulled three new concepts and theories that I have never heard before and liked:

• Locus of Control
• Kohler Effect
• Galatea Effect & Pygmalion Effect

LOCUS OF CONTROL

Locus of control is the degree to which people believe that they have control over the outcome of events in their lives, as opposed to external forces beyond their control.  This concept was developed by psychologist Julian Rotter in the 1950's.  I'll explain the two types:

Internal Locus of Control - these individuals believe through their thoughts and actions, they have the power to control what happens to them in life...good or bad.  Like my boy He-Man used to say, "I have the POWER!"

External Locus of Control - these people believe they cannot control their life, but their outcomes are decided by environmental and external factors, which they cannot influence.  I think of Winnie the Pooh's Eeyore, "I'd look on the bright side if I could find it."

I love this concept because it encourages people to reflect on how they see the world and what kind of influence they believe they have.  I'm sure you have individuals that you work with or have friends that constantly use words like, "luck," "it's not fair," "it's not my fault," or "when am I going to get a break?"  These thoughts definitely fall under and External Locus of Control.  If you are one of these people, it's time to actively switch your mindset to one that believes through daily choices, discipline, and hard work, you can MAKE THINGS HAPPEN!

Your life will not change for the better until you take ownership of your feelings, successes, and failures.  Are you playing the complain and blame game?  Snap out of it!  Take ownership of your results, be grateful for every opportunity good or bad, and use it as a means to learn and grow.  Try to have more of an Internal Locus of Control.

I really enjoy this quote

KOHLER EFFECT

The Kohler effect is a phenomenon that occurs when a person works harder as a member of a group than when working alone.  This concept was founded by German psychologist Otto Kohler in the 1920's.  His work was rekindled by another German psychologist Erich Witte in the late 1980's.  What they found was that in groups, people commonly exert more effort, perform better, and raise their standards when pushed or when they compare themselves to others in a group...hmmm can you say CrossFit?

This is why I love team sports and the fact that the best teams get the most out of each individual's talent.  The Kohler Effect forces people within a group to evaluate and push their expectations of themselves and go harder in order to not let their teammates down.  

Life is meant to be spent together.  Anytime you are faced with a challenge, new task, or obstacle, remember this and invite a buddy to take along the journey with you (i.e. going to the gym, learning a new skill, personal development, etc.).  This accountability, encouragement, and support might be all the difference to taking your outcomes to the next level.

GALATEA EFFECT & PYGMALION EFFECT

The Galatea Effect and Pygmalion Effect are both self fulfilling prophecies and describe the power of expectations...but from two different sources.  This concept came from Greek mythology, which when I researched it a little more was confusing and weird.  Basically, this dude Pygmalion fell in love with a statue he created named Galatea.  Needless to say, the Galatea effect can be described as one's own opinion about their ability and self-worth has a direct influence on their performance.  This is also called one's self-efficacy or "one's belief in their abilities."  Basically, if you think you can or you can't, you're right...but in this case, people who trust their abilities and skill sets, create positive outcomes because of this inner confidence.

High expectations can come from many different sources.  I am really drawn to the Pygmalion effect from a leadership perspective because this is a phenomenon in which the higher the expectation (let's hope a healthy stretch goal) placed on people - often employees, students, and children - these people perform better.  This approach can be characterized by leaders who encourage, support, and challenge their people to raise their standards. These leaders are able to help their constituents to achieve success at a higher level.  I'm sure you can think of leaders, teachers, managers, or coaches that did this for you.  They made you feel special, talented, and gave you confidence...thus you performed better.  These are my favorite leaders (I love you Coach Mike Price!).

The only time I fumbled a punt, Coach Price hugged me and said, "You're our guy...don't worry about it." Powerful.

So whatever controls or effects you utilize, just remember these 4 things:

1. LOCUS OF CONTROL: You and only you have control over your outcomes.  Take ownership of this, stop blaming outside circumstances, and take life by the horns.  This mindset changes everything.  It's not up to anybody, but YOU!
2. KOHLER EFFECT: You want to improve your fitness, learn a new skill, or take your life to the next level?...do things with other people.  Get into an accountability group.  Take on new challenges not alone, but with people you love and trust...you'll bring out the best in each other and the togetherness and teamwork, will help raise your level of output and resilience.
3. GALATEA EFFECT: Your self belief, image, and expectations of yourself are so important.  See yourself as a winner and you will be a winner.  It all starts in the mind.  Believe and expect amazing things for you and they will happen! 
4. PYGMALION EFFECT: The power of encouragement, support, and love are so strong - especially from people in leadership positions.  Use this concept at home with your children, in social settings, and in team environments.  Positive praise and enthusiasm can do wonders.  Use this technique to get more out of others you work with and care about.  Remember the movie the Water Boy..."YOU CAN DO IT!"  Let's remember to utilize phrases like these...I can speak from personal experience...these uplifting words were more effective then being belittled and put down.

Let's go...Lights. Camera. Action!  Live a life with these Special Effects, and you will write a script for yourself that only Hollywood could create...and I believe it will be a masterpiece. 

RICH AND FAMOUS

Researchers of a recent study asked Millennials this question:

What do you think will make you "Happy?"

• 80% said to be "rich"

• 50% said to be "famous"

Hmmm, we have some work to do here. It's a little bit concerning that this is the world we live in. If you are wondering who exactly Millennials are...they are individuals who were born from the early 80's to the year 2000. I just missed the cut, but fall under the Generation Y category (mid 60's to early 80's).

With the advances in technology and access to many mediums that provide instant feedback, our attention spans and patience have significantly shrunk...I mean drastically. Let me list a few things that can be credited for this shrinkage (there's something about that word I just don't like):

• cell phones (do people even have home phones anymore?)
• text messaging (do people...especially young people even talk anymore?)
• social media (Instagram, Snapchat, LinkedIn, Twitter, Vine, Facebook...do people think quietly to themselves anymore?)

When we have a minute or two of down time, we open the old smart phone and review our "likes" and comments, while comparing ourselves to everyone else's virtual reality we create for ourselves via filters, lighting, angles, and #tbt's. The smart phone really has changed everything.  I'll save my rant about reality TV for another post...but seriously, how many reality TV shows are on now?...they dominate all stations.

Does this scene look familiar? 

The Baby Boomers (born post WWII to mid 60's) didn't have the luxury to ask someone out on a date via text...or check their Tinder page. Here's another question, do people even write letters anymore? The "Best Generation" (born in the 20's and 30's) couldn't fax, email, or send a Snap to their boo or best bud (is the hand written note or thank you card a lost art?)

What I'm trying to say is that the word PATIENCE is almost non-existent. Instant gratification is at an all-time high. From binge watching entire seasons on Netflix to becoming an overnight celebrity on YouTube....the term "hard-work" and "paying your dues" have been lost...not just with Millennials or Generation Y (early 2000's to present)...this includes grown folk too.

Here's my point, many people think that being "rich" or success happens overnight...or that being famous is the highway to happiness. I'm here to tell you that couldn't be further from the truth. Stop waiting for the homerun and start playing "small ball"...do the little things, hustle, bust your butt, break your dreams into smaller goals. Add those little things up over time and you'll get big things. Being grateful for what you have now will create more opportunities to receive a life of more abundance later. Playing the blame game and being a victim will get you nowhere.

You want to get paid like Bill?  Work as hard as Bill.

Here's another thing, many people quit the moment there's a set back, failure, or adversity. This is why there are so few extremely successful people. The system is designed that way. It's designed to keep those types of people out. Trust me, the people who win the most have failed the most. They simply view failure differently.

The average Joe sees failure as a roadblock, where successful people see failure as a building block. 

Obsessing over only outcomes is a recipe for disaster. Being consumed by what you perceive other people think of you and making that a huge part of how you create your self worth is not the way to live.

The path to success is never a straight line

My life didn't change until I learned that gratitude is the real currency. Self love, forgiveness, and acceptance is where rest and peace are found. Wealth is in relationships and living in community with others - and contributing to that greater good is where fulfillment lives. Progress and personal development is the ultimate status symbol. Fulfillment is understanding and trusting what God created you to do...and then doing it...not for other's appraisal but for simply living in your gift. No one's strength and talent is too small or insignificant. You were made for a reason. You are chosen. You are worthy. You are more than your profile page.

People who do something with the intent to be "rich" or "famous" need to find a new motive. Those two are like sugar and carbs, they taste good, but will burn out fast and are unhealthy if they are the only source that you fill yourself with.

My children's generation have not been classified with a name yet, but for those of you who have kids like Kendra and I, let's model a new vision of "what Happy looks like?" My dream is when asked the same question the younger generation (including Baylor, Bellamy, and Winnie) will say:

• Self love and self awareness

• Being generous and contributing to others

Sue me. I'm a dreamer. So here's my advice: Work hard. Be patient. Put your phone down. Invest in your personal development. Know that you will rise faster by serving others. Love yourself without the "likes." Oh, and take walks with your family to Starbucks.

That is all. 

UNLEASH THE LION

My little cubs: Baylor, Winnie, and Bellamy

Before I put each of my 3 kids to bed at night I say the same prayer with them:

1. Thank you God for this amazing gift.
2. Please protect them and keep them safe.
3. I pray that they love You and put You first.
4. I pray that they love themselves and are confident in who they are and how they are made unique and special.
5. I pray that they love and serve others.

What is interesting here is that the 4th one is the longest.  This 4th prayer might be the hardest and most complicated.  This 4th request might be the difference in how they process failure, success, and all the challenges life throws at us.  

In essence what I am asking God is that my children have self-confidence.

In the end, God has the final say, but I believe that He also gives us free-will...and one of the most powerful forms of free-will we have is our self-image - how we see ourselves.  Your self-image sets the stage for what you expect out of yourself, how you let others treat you, and what you get out of life.

Here's a story to help me explain:  

One day in the jungle, a Lion, his Lioness, and their cub Ayo where out on a morning walk together.  Unfortunately, a gang of hunters spotted them and went in for the kill.  Seeing this the Lion picked up and threw Ayo into the bushes and he and his bride sacrificed themselves to save their boy.  The cub was safe, but abandoned...Ayo cried and cried because he was scared and ached for his parents.  

Luckily though, not much time had passed and a herd of sheep came by and adopted the lion cub.  Ayo grew up with this herd of sheep and even came to believe that he was a sheep.  Ayo ate like a sheep, baaa'd like a sheep, followed others like a sheep, and was timid like a sheep.  One day several years later, the new Alpha Lion and King of the Jungle, Desta, was on the outer rim of the jungle and spotted the sheep.  He ran after them, but stopped in shock when he saw another lion.  All the sheep scattered and fled, including Ayo.  Desta cornered Ayo and said, "What's wrong with you?!" What are you doing with these sheep?"  Ayo replied, "Please have mercy on me, please don't kill me."

Desta couldn't believe what he was seeing.  He even asked Ayo to roar, but all Ayo did was baaaa like a sheep.  Disgusted, Desta grabbed Ayo and took him to the nearby river.  He told him to look at his reflection in the water.  Ayo looked down and saw a beautiful and powerful mane.  He looked back at Desta, then back at the reflection, and back again several times.  Desta said, "You are a Lion!  Now roar like one!"  Ayo puffed out his chest and tried, but all that came out was a weak growl.  Desta swiftly slapped Ayo accross the face with his powerful paw and said again, "You are a Lion!  The King of the Jungle!...now roar like one!"  Ayo looked at his paws, saw his sharp claws; he opened his mouth and saw his enormous teeth; he looked again into the river and a flash back of his brave father came to him.  Just like that, his self image change.  Ayo then stood up and roared the loudest roar the jungle had ever heard.  All corners of the jungle could hear this thunderous and powerful sound.  Ayo's days as a sheep were over.

HOW DO YOU SEE YOURSELF: AS A LION OR A SHEEP?

You and only you have the power to make that choice.  Do you see yourself living a life in abundance or scarcity?  Achieving your dreams and being the best version of you starts in the mind.  Take a moment to think about all the negative thoughts you have been telling yourself; stop thinking about what the doubters or haters have said about you; flush away your past failures; dismiss thinking of a future where you are not just absolutely crushing it.

Lets take a lesson from The King himself, LeBron James and do "The Silencer." LeBron has consistently quieted the doubters (3 rings, brought a championship to Cleveland, coming back being down 3 games to 1 vs. Golden State).  Usain Bolt paid homage to the King, by winning his 3rd 100 meter and 200 meter Golds at the Rio Olympics - many didn't believed he could do it AGAIN...then he hit 'em with The Silencer.  Here are the steps (I saw this on ESPN's Instagram last week):

I love the caption...And then he hit 'em with The Silencer

1. Push your hands down, while you lift your knees up (do this twice) - this represents pushing down your suppressive thoughts.
2. Make a fist and pound your chest 2 times - this represents, you ringing the bell for a new era, a new you...you are pumping up your Lion Heart.
3. Now, let out a roar so loud that everyone on the block can hear - Unleash the Lion Within!

Silence YOUR self doubt and often false perception of what you might think OTHERS think of you.  This exercise is the first step to changing your self image.  Believe that you are chosen.  Know that you are loved.  Trust that you are created to do something so amazing that only God could have planned it.  Start raising your expectations of yourself and find someone like Desta to knock some sense into you, inspire you, and reinforce that you HAVE THE POWER!!!...my 6th prayer is that you love yourself and UNLEASH the LION inside of you.  Start being the best version of you TODAY! 

WHAT IS YOUR WHY?

When your WHY is big enough, you will find your HOW.

Why do you do what you do?  What motivates you?  Have you ever spent time to think about it?  If you have, good for you.  If you haven't, it's time you started.  This is my last post to finish my series of solidifying what your personal brand is all about...and I think it very well could be the most important.

The first step at figuring out what drives your behavior is discovering the real reason why you get out of bed each day.  It could be money, recognition, providing for your family, proving somebody wrong, desire to be the best...this list could be endless.  If your "Why"is not well actualized, it is very difficult to achieve the results you desire...in this case, you "PRESS:"

• Pressure...it's hard to have lasting success when you are contanstantly in a state of pressure
• Retaliation/Revenge...motives of getting even and revenge are unhealthy and short lived
• Expectations of others...you have to want it and believe it
• Someone else's goal...if your motive and goal isn't yours, how can you truly commit? 
• Stuck...when you feel you have no way out or are stuck, panic and stress take over

When your motives are in the wrong place, you will PRESS.

When you PRESS, you will not sustain success.

Simon Sinek, author of the book Start With Why explains it very well. Organizations (or people for that matter) that do not thrive or even reach their full potential, is because they are starting at the wrong place. He calls it, "The Golden Circle." Most companies or people when looking at accomplishing their goals start in this order: 1) What is it that we/I do, 2) How do we/I do it, and 3) Why do we/I do it?

That's the wrong way. Here's the right way...I just saw that Apple has over 1 billion devices being used in the world today. Why has Apple been so massively successful? Notice earlier I said "devices" not computers. Apple did start out has a computer company, but because of Steve Jobs' vision and creating a clear "Why": to creat innovative, quality technologies that are user friendly. Their Why was never we are a "computer company"....no sir, that could be their "What." Their Why is to be an "innovator"....iPods, iPhones, iPads, MacBooks don't look or perform like desk top computers. This is an example of the importance of starting with Why.

Consumers love innovative, products that make life easier and more enjoyable.  In this case, they connect with the Why...that is why they buy Apple. Start with WHY, and the rest will fall into to place. Another example is the creator of Tom's shoes. Their motto is "One for One." For each shoe they sell, they will donate a pair of shoes to someone in need. Now that is a Why I can get behind!

Ok, you might be thinking enough with the business examples, what about ME?!...here goes. Think about a time in your life when you were so committed, so driven, and so focused on accomplishing something, you couldn't be stopped. Maybe it was finally dating your love interest, landing that job, losing weight, quitting a bad habit, or supporting a child or loved one. You probably said to yourself, there is no going back, this is my purpose, this is my vision, there was no backup plan...you were all in!

 If you can combine that drive and hunger with doing something you love...that is an amazing combination! What are you passionate about? What are you really good at? Leverage those to help create your Why.

What is it that you want? The Bible says, "Ask and you shall receive." Having a clear Why will take you there. We need to get our mind, body, and soul into that "state," that frame of mind, in "the zone."

A few of you might cringe when you are asked, "What is your passion?" For a lot of young people and even adults, that is a tough one. While on a plane a few weeks ago, I listened to a TED Talk on the topic of creativity. One of the presenters was the author Elizabeth Gilbert, from the book Eat, Pray, Love (over 10 million sold and was made into a movie staring Julia Roberts). I learned 2 things from her that might help with establishing your Why:

1) If you don't have a crystal clear PASSION, then ask yourself this question, "What am I CURIOUS about?" Your curiosity in a subject, service, thing, or type of people, will help lead you to your Why.

2) During the creative process, you cannot be afraid to fail. Fear of failure is the #1 killer of creativity. This mindset, retools how to look at failure and outcomes...there is no finish line, just growth and creation. We need to buy our own Why!

Author of the book Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert

Now onto Step 3), which could be most important: what drives you besides money? Money and status come and go. When your Why goes deeper, trust me, the money will come. Remember, the PROCESS is more important than the OUTCOME. The journey is tough. There will be set backs. Your Why gets you out of bed; your Why helps you overcome hardships; you're Why helps you get back up when you are knocked down. If your Why doesn't do this, it's time for a new one. Without a strong and clear Why, you will be lost. 

Here is my Why: I used to live a life full of insecurities. I was constantly judging myself, and being my worst critic.  I set unreal expectations for myself. I didn't celebrate wins because they were expected...but I would consistently beat myself up if I failed. I've learned that there is hope. Contribution and growth are premiums, failures and obstacles are blessings and opportunities. Wealth isn't in money or accolades, it's in relationships and helping people...I've come out the other end of the tunnel. I want to share the light and peace that gratitude and service provide...how faith never fails. Why am I doing this blog, it's simple: to give people the tools to become they BEST VERSION OF THEMSELVES.

It's time to come up with your Why. Think about it, write it down, tell someone, and start living it!!!