STRENGTHS - Part I

STRENGTHS: You are MADE WELL // What you are MADE TO DO.

Part I: You are MADE WELL

So as I'm writing this I am on an airplane flying back to Seattle from a work trip in Montana.  I had the pleasure of spending the evening and morning with my dear friends from college – Matt and Sara Kegel.  They have a cabin on one of the most beautiful picturesque sites in the world, Holter Lake, which is about an hour south of Great Falls.

 

Nothing like a Montana sunset.

After swimming with the kids and going on an amazing boat ride looking at mountain goats, bald eagles, a mother deer and fawn, rolling hills and mountains so beautiful you’d swear you died and gone to heaven (they say Montana is God’s country)…I found myself falling back into an old habit.  Once we got back inside the cabin, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror.  For those of you who have followed my blog, might remember that I have mentioned in more than one occasion that I am a bit on the vain side.  My vanity and insecurities popped up again.  I looked in the mirror and thought, “Dang, my hair sure looks on the thin side right now…I wish I had hair like Matt.”  I guess that’s what swimming in the lake and going 45 mph on a boat will do to you (two places you probably wouldn’t find Donald Trump for obvious reasons).

Most people and DEFINITELY most guys are too prideful to discuss or bring up things about themselves that they are not happy with.  We as flawed humans are consumed and often times obsess over our blemishes instead of focusing on and playing up our strengths.  For many years I was one of those people.  I could have dozens of outstanding qualities, but like many people, I’d generate a majority of my self-worth and self-efficacy (or lack thereof) by focusing on what I view or think other people perceive as flaws.  If you can relate to this do a Zoolander Blue Steel look for me… “Hansel so HOT right now”…(I watched Zoolander 2 on the flight to MT and actually really liked it)… “What is that, a Reading Center for ANTS!?”  Ok, enough with the Zoolander quotes.

What do you see - a young or old lady? When you look in the mirror do you focus on your strengths or perceived blemishes?

Many, like I sometime do, fall into the trap of comparing one isolated area that we feel is inferior to somebody else – whether it’s one’s appearance, skill set, trait, or circumstance.  Many take it to a very unhealthy place and base what they see on TV, movies, magazines, and now more than ever – social media as their barometer on how they should look, act, and feel.  

I’m here to encourage you to stop those thoughts.  Instead, focus on your strengths, strong traits and physical features that are unique and special compared to others.  God made you just the way you are supposed to be made.  If you are living your life constantly comparing how you look and your skill sets as inferior…snap out of it!  I don’t care how attractive or how someone looks…even Brad Pitt or Gigi Hadid look in the mirror and don’t like something about themselves.

 True beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.  Insecurities and self-defeating thoughts will only hold you back from being the best version of you.  Focusing on your flaws is an endless game that you cannot win.  Guess what…we all are flawed.  We all have things about ourselves that we don’t like…no matter who we are.  Here’s the thing, If you fall into this camp and are really unhappy with something about yourself, then  DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT and STOP COMPLAINING and feeling DEFEATED!

Aside from focusing on one’s physical appearance, we need to spend more time focusing on what we are good at – our natural abilities – specialized skills or traits that we possess.   If we continue to compare ourselves to everyone else and think we need to be an expert in everything, that’s another recipe for disaster.  Strengths are the great equalizer.  When you meet someone for the first time, have an important business meeting with a new client, or come across somebody that possess a skill that you don’t…just remember that you have a unique set of skills that they do not…therefor they are no better or worse than you – just different!  This shift of how you perceive yourself and others is LIFE CHANGING!

A Harvard Business Review study revealed breakthrough research on how humans perceive themselves versus others.  They created a study where they introduced people to other people and asked them how they perceived the other person.  Person #1 usually responded by giving feedback like:

• Person #2 seems smarter than me
• They have a better sense of style
• They seem more confident
• They look content and relaxed

An interesting finding was that when they asked person #2 the same question, they gave similar feedback about person #1…they perceived that person as more affluent, put-together, or even “cooler” than them.  Wow, right?  Now I know why girls always say, "She looked at me funny."  That's probably because the girl was actually thinking, "Hmm, she is really cute." 

Start taking control of how you see yourself.  If you fall into the pattern of focusing on your flaws, make today the day, you spend time highlighting your strengths, being grateful how you are unique, and remember:

You can’t change the world if you’re like everybody else!

Part II of STRENGTHS – what you were MADE TO DO, I’ll discuss how you can improve your finances and overall life satisfaction by going all in on your strengths in your career.  Enjoy this AMAZING WEEKEND! 

A 180 Degree Turn is Only a Matter of 1.5

Ideas are just ideas WITHOUT COMMITMENT

Goals are simply goals WITHOUT ACTION

Dreams are just dreams WITHOUT EXECUTION

I'm down here in Bend, Oregon for a conference at the beautiful Sunriver Resort.  Its 90 degrees + all weekend.  They just got a new pool last year, there's golf, trails, shops, and cool places to eat...one problem, my family is not with me.  So what do I do when I have free time, alone?...I read about or watch YouTube videos of inspiring people.  The old me, would probably go see a movie, dink around with my phone and all my social media apps, or binge on Netflix (with nobody to chill with...poor me).

For some reason, those things that I just listed do not fill me up like they used to.  Since I started this blog I have been researching almost obsessively what causes success...looking for habits, traits, and philosophies of ordinary people who do extraordinary things.

One common denominator of people who have extreme success is they do more with their time. 

I get it, after a long hard days work, putting out fires, grinding, commuting to and from work, dealing with people, you need time to decompress and disengage for a bit.  TV is a great outlet, spending time with our loved ones in my opinion is the best outlet, and many of us turn to our phones to escape from the rat race of life.  But for too many, this phone epidemic is getting a little out of hand (I haven't even gotten into video games).  From games, to various apps, to emails and text messages, Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc.  There is a name for people who have a cell phone addiction...its called "nomophobia."  People create a neurological addiction, where they cannot be separated from there phones, laptops, iPads, or tablets...similar to craving cigarettes or alcohol.

My challenge to you is to invest in yourself 1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week.  The weekends are all yours.  I promise you, no one ever looks back on their life and says, "I wish I would have played Candy Crush or World of Warcraft more," or "My life would have been a whole lot better if I spent more time on Instagram."  No one ever reflects and says, "If only I would have slept more, watched more TV, binged more shows on Netflix, or played more video games."

Don't be like this dude..get off the couch!

Here is how you can do a 180 degree turn that will set your goals and dreams in motion...it starts by carving out 1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week, which is 7.5 hours per week, 30 hours per month.  Try this for six months and you'll have invested 180 hours (hence the 180 degree transformation) into yourself.

1. Look at all your social media apps 3 times per day and that's it: morning, afternoon, and once at night.  That's plenty of time to evaluate all your likes and commenting on post that make you smile.
2.  When you come home, engage with your loved ones with no distractions: No TV, put the phones away, and do like they did in the 1950's, talk and check in with each other.
3. Limit your "shows" to no more than 2: There's nothing wrong with having a go-to show or two, but 10 is a liiiiitle too much.
4. Focus 1.5 hours of your time doing something productive: After you've engaged with your family, ate dinner, put the kids down, checked your phone for a few minutes, invest in your development.
5. The world is your oyster: during this time, read a book, learn a new skill, get inspired, listen to a podcast, practice your craft, write, meditate, exercise, call and talk to a mentor, finally turn your idea into a small business...there are so many possibilities for self improvement!

Feel like you you don't have enough time to get everything done?  Here's a novel idea...wake up earlier!  Take care of the most critical things you need to get done first, so you free yourself up to do what you want.  Stop being like every one else who has a million excuses and isn't happy with where they are in their life.  Take action!

As each day passes, its a lost opportunity to get better. Live with no regrets!

We only have a finite number of days on this earth.  Only God knows that number.  Maximize each day!  You and only you have the power to make daily decisions on how you spend your time...are you going to improve and get better or settle or get worse?

Make the decision today that you'll wish you made 5, 10, 15 years from now.

So what area do you want to improve?  What new skill do you want to develop?  Turn your passion project into a reality.  Finally create your side project into a legit small business.  For you non entrepreneurs, learn to play the piano or guitar, improve your finances and knowledge in investing, write a book, or improve your fitness.  Like I said, the world is your oyster.  Commit to yourself 1.5 hours per day for 5 days a week for 6 months, and your life will take a 180 degree turn for the better.  Set a goal, create a plan, and get after it!!!  Breaking big things down into little chunks, makes what seems impossible, possible.

So how did I come up with 1.5 hours, 5 days a week for 6 months?  Here's how: Scientific research shows it takes 66 days to form a habit...so that takes up the first 2 months, just forming a habit of making time to invest in yourself.  From there, you can further specialize or add multiple new skills to your repertoire.  Josh Kaufman, author, blogger, and motivational speaker, says you can actually learn a new skill in 20 hours...not the 10,000 hour rule suggested by best selling author Malcolm Gladwell. 

If you don't invest in yourself, no one else will.  1.5 hours per day, 5 days a week, will allow you to do just that.  Go for it!  You will thank yourself in the future.

LOVE TO WIN / HATE TO LOSE

Answer this question:

Do you love to win or hate to lose?

During an interview over 2 years ago, I was asked that question.  "Interesting query," I internalized...(since I use the word query on the reg), while I frantically tried to process this simple yet complex question.  I responded by saying, "Both.  I love to win and I hate to lose."  The hiring manager challenged my answer and said, "You can't chose both, you have to pick one."  "Well, I suppose I hate to lose then if I have to pick," I replied.

Let me preface that this was one of the worst interviews I've ever done.  The hiring manager was one of the biggest jerks I've ever come across in an interview setting.  He was hardcore, never smiled, challenged every single response I gave, and I let him rattle me.  He asked me if I was a rule follower...I said yes.  He then asked quickly, "Well do you ever speed?"  I said, "Sometimes I go above the speed limit, I guess."  He said, "So then you are a liar...you do break the rules."  Cray cray right?

OK, I digress.  Back to the question of whether you love to win or hate to lose.  The one thing about this horrific interview was it exposed me to a really beautiful question that challenges one's core values, motivation, and fundamental belief system.  As a sales trainer, I often use this question to explore a new hire's paradigm and approach to sales.  Most often, these new hires and other people that I ask, say "both."  A close second is "I hate to lose."  Hating to lose is the dogma that has been ingrained in most high-achievers, go-getters, type A's, athletes, and sales people all over the world.  Select sports, advanced placement programs, and special clubs are at an all-time high for children and the ages are getting younger and younger.  For me, playing select sports at a young age, the idea that winning is the only option was implanted in my psyche early on.  Many, like me, received self worth and our identities based on wins and losses.

To error is human, but to forgive is not the policy of this company.   

Three out of my first four years in medical sales, I received a phone call informing me whether I was able to keep my job or not due to down-sizing and layoffs.  Luckily, my sales performance was always good enough to stay employed.  Winning and losing is often times a matter of receiving a paycheck or not...this is true, but as I've become older and wiser, I feel like many of us are missing the point.

There is another group of parents and individuals that believe every one deserves a medal, a golden star, and a trophy for simply participating.  "We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings," they say.  I unequivocally do not fall into that category or agree with this set of beliefs.  I believe this is a huge problem that manifests entitlement, complacency, and narcissism.  In life, sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.  You get the girl, or you don't.  You land the job, or they offer it to someone else.  You get accepted into the college of your dreams, or your application is denied.

Greatest rapper of all-time, Y or N?

The point I'm trying to make is that failure is a key component of one's development.  Two very different individuals, but visionaries in their own unique way - Tupac Shakur and Nelson Mandela - both are quoted in saying, "I never lose.  I either win or I learn."  So many focus on the outcome instead of the process...their growth.  If we spend more time channeling our energy in our preparation, attitude, focus, and effort, the outcome is irrelevant.  Growth, knowledge, stretching oneself, and improvement should be the emphasis.  If you look at goal attainment this way, trust me, the wins will come.

Seek PROGRESS, not perfection.

When you bust your ass, give it all you got, and leave it all out there, and come up short...there's nothing wrong with that.  Obsessing over perfection will paralyze you.  This approach, of looking at outcomes from a different perspective, might actually help you win more.  Being clutch is doing what you normally do when it matters most.  Being able to lay your head down at night in peace whether you win OR lose, because you are judging yourself on a different set of criteria vs. the W or L column, is I think the only way to live...and perform at your best.  Judging myself on my preparation, being present in the moment, and leaving no ammo left (meaning I spilled my guts going as hard, as intense as I could...with a purpose, passion, and a plan)...if I lose, I can live with that.  The next step, is to evaluate where I fell short, adjust, improve, and try again.

Wisdom from one of the greatest of all-time: Sweetness

Many of you have viewed losing the same way I did for most of my life...you give it all the power.  This thought process forces people to miss the 5 foot putt, or choke when they have to perform in front of their manager or a really important client.  When the fear of losing is absent, and you shift that energy away from the black and whiteness of a win or a loss and evaluate and reward yourself based on a different set of criteria, you will in turn be more clutch.  Stop giving fear the power!  You are not defined by your failure, but how you react to it (learn, grow, and improve).  Losing the battle is not detrimental if your focus is on winning the war...having a macro perspective vs. micro...the power of perspective changes everything.

Life is short...celebrate the wins, learn from the losses.  Adversity, obstacles, and challenges often times are our greatest gift.  I don't enjoy losing, I just look at it differently.  My self-efficacy can be found in the E & G column (Effort and Growth)...not by wins and losses.  

So now my answer to the question is: 
I LOVE TO WIN! 

CORE VALUES

Your core values are the deeply held beliefs that authentically describe your soul. - John C. Maxwell

During a 2006 vacation to Argentina, entrepreneur Blake Mycoskie met a woman who worked with a volunteer organization that gave shoes to kids in need.  Mycoskie joined in the cause and visited village after village and saw first hand the sores, blisters, and infections not having shoes caused.  He was deeply effected.  He came back to American inspired with a vision.  Shortly thereafter the vision for Toms was created...The One For One business model was the core mission of his shoe company.  For every shoe they sell, Toms will give a shoe to someone in need.  This core value of service has made Mycoskie and Toms very successful and set the path for how he would operate his then small company, which has grown to millions and millions of dollars in sales.

Toms founder Blake Mycoskie

Core values are enduring beliefs or ideals that drive one's behavior.  It tells us "what is and what is not good" in our actions.  These guiding principles influence how we make our choices, what choices we do make, and often times how we are judged in our actions by these choices.  Like Katy Perry says in the song Roar, "I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything."  Don't be that Katy.

What happens when an individual or company does not have sound core values?  Well, ask Lance Armstrong and former members of the leadership team at Enron how that went.  Without core values, clear ideals and guiding principles that aid us in our decision making, we are playing with fire.  Tiger Woods' domination of the golf world came crashing down when it was reported that he had been living a double life filled with lies, cover-ups, and extra marital affairs.

Core values help us make the tough decisions.  I love the concept that with clear values, decisions are easy.  I wish it was that simple, but if we haven't examined what we stand for, the type of person we want to be, and what is important to us, sometimes decisions are not easy.  By taking ownership of your values and defining your beliefs - what's important to you - you are setting up a system that will guide you through the challenges life throws us.  

Think about people that you respect and have learned from...maybe they are your parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, family members, your pastor, or close friends.  What have you learned from them?  How do you want them to see you?  How do you want your children to see you?  Remember, most children do what you do, not what you say.  If you haven't yet, it's time to think about your core values and write them down.  Here are two articles to help you drill down your core values:

7 Steps to Discovering Your Core Values

Define Your Personal Core Values in 5 Steps

While speaking to a leadership class at Sumner High School, I shared my core values.  I came up with an acronym: GEARS.  In order to achieve our goals and final destination in this journey of life, its important - just like a car - to have the transmission (your belief system) in the right gear. 

Gratitude: in all things be grateful.

Effort &

Attitude: no matter what is happening around me, I can always control my effort and attitude

Right Thing: "R" stand for "Do the RIGHT thing."  The definition of integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking.

Service: My goal is to leave a legacy of service...loving and helping others.

Carroll's book: Win Forever is a must read

Pete Carroll's first two stints as a head coach in the NFL didn't go as well as he had hoped.  First with the New York Jets and later with the New England Patriots, both ending in him being fired.  After being let go from the Patriots organization, Pete went through something he had not experienced in his career...he had no job, but time, a lot of time.  This time away from the game forced him to re-evaluate his coaching philosophies.  While as a head coach in NY and NE, Pete felt he was not letting his true core beliefs and values shine through.  He conformed his approach to meet the old school expectations of leading the way NFL teams have always been lead: having no fun and coaching players out of fear, instead of uplifting them.

Inspired by legendary UCLA basketball coach John Wooden's Pyramid of Success, Carroll wrote down his core values and coaching philosophy.  He promised himself, the next time he had the opportunity to be a head coach, he would run his program lead by these guiding principles.  The rest is history...he dominated the Pac-12 at USC and when no believed his style would work in the NFL, his approach has proven very successful and copied by many other coaches in the league and by coaches from other sports, including Steve Kerr from the record setting Golden State Warriors.

Take time, just like Carroll...dig deep and discover your core values.  Once you have come up with these pillars of believe that drive your behavior, write them down and tell someone and remember:

You can't follow your dreams if you only follow others. 

My next topic in my series "Building Your Brand" will focus on identifying your strengths.  Enjoy the holiday weekend!!!

PS: Interested in getting inspired about discovering your core values?  Read this book...its a game changer!

  

BUILD YOUR BRAND

Do you know that you are always interviewing? Whether you are aware of it or not, people are creating a perception and label of you. With our family, friends, at the office, social media...we are constantly forming people's opinions of us by how we carry ourselves, act, talk, what we post, and how we treat others. This thought can be overwhelming and sound like a lot of pressure, but it doesn't have to be. It's time to start thinking about your brand. Your brand should be consistent and cross over to all areas of your life (at home, at work, socially, etc.). But how can it be consistent if you haven't spent time examining, exploring, and asking yourself vital questions that help you understand what drives your behavior? The cool thing is, if you know who you are and are comfortable in who you are, and know what you want - who gives a %$#@ what people think?

Here lies the question: do people see you the same way you see yourself? Have you set your standards too low for yourself? Are you maximizing your strengths? Do you love to wake up each day and have a zest and zeal to achieve your goals? These are the questions that I hope to help you answer in my next few blog posts. My goal is to help you explore 3 areas that form your brand - I call it your WHAT, HOW, and WHY:

• WHAT: what are your core values?
• HOW: how are you unique - what are your strengths?
• WHY: why do you do what you do - what motivates you?

Here's the deal, you should not let others create your brand, image, or label for you. We all should take ownership of our brand. We have the freedom to choose our mindset and our actions each day. This unspeakable freedom should not be underestimated. I hope today is the day you take ownership of how others and you see yourself. Every corporation and company has a brand: Nike, Starbucks, Nordstrom, and Apple, are a few of my favorites. When you think of these companies, you instantly have a perception of what they stand for, what they are good at, and why you buy from them. These and other companies have spent hundreds of hours and millions of dollars to formulate their brand. Isn't it time you do the same?

The most powerful force in the universe is how you see your self - your self perception.  

Have you ever been to the circus?  I have not, but mindset coach Tony Robbins often tells a story about elephants at the circus. When elephants are newly born, their owners tie the elephant up to a stake in the ground. That little elephant tries with all his might to break free from that stake. Unfortunately, that little guy hasn't developed enough strength to break away. This elephant tries and tries each day to break away to no avail and eventually gives up. As the elephant grows and grows he doesn't even attempt to pull free, because he has been conditioned to think he's stuck. He doesn't understand the power he has, because his perception of his strength has been greatly diminished by conditioning from outside forces.  

Can you relate to this example? Have you been conditioned to see yourself a certain way? Its time to reassess your perception. Only you have the power to change your standards and how you see yourself, as well as others. The old saying, "whether you think you can or cannot, you are right," fits perfectly here. My next three post will help you explore and think about what makes you, you. I'll help you examine, what is your true north...what are your core values? Next, I'll help you identify your strengths and how you can use them to generate personal satisfaction and wealth. Finally, and most importantly, I discuss finding your why - what drives you and motivates you to take action and be your best...is it recognition, money, creating a better position for your family, or something different? 

Check back in...I'm excited to help you build your brand.

   

COMMIT TO BE FIT

How's your fitness right now?  We all know the many health benefits of exercising, but there are many obstacles getting in the way of making working out one of our weekly habits:

• Work
• Kid's schedules
• Lack of time
• Several other commitments
• Don't know what to do
• Don't enjoy it 

All of these are real challenges, but we need, have to, and MUST make physical fitness a key piece of our routine to be the best version of ourselves.  According to the Mayo Clinic, let me remind you of a few of the physical benefits:

• Increases energy
• Combats health conditions and diseases (heart disease, blood pressure, lowers cholesterol, etc.)
• Controls weight
• Promotes better sleep
• Puts the spark back into your sex life (where my married peeps at?)
• Prevents injury

The physical advantages of committing a life of fitness are clear, but did you know your mental health will drastically improve as well.  Here are some of the advantages exercise will provide your mental state:

• Improve your mood
• Alleviate anxiety
• Improve self confidence
• Boost "happy chemicals" (endorphins, which decreases depression and increases happiness)
• Tap into creativity & improve brain power
• Improve memory

I believe all these physical and mental benefits to be true, but let me personalize why I work out.  I'm a fairly vain person.  I take pride in my appearance and want to look good.  However, I exercise because its an escape and I really enjoy it.  I once was told by former WSU defensive back coach, Kenny Greene, who looked amazing for his age, "Weight lifting is the fountain of youth."  I believe this to be true.  If done correctly, mixing in weight bearing exercises with some sort of cardio reduces risk of injury, increases energy, and helps you feel and look younger. 

The physical benefits are clear, but I must say, the mental benefits might be more impactful!  The gym is the number one place where I think.  We all should spend at least 15 minutes per day by ourselves thinking.  When I get to the gym, I have my music playing, my blood is flowing, I'm letting off some steam, and I am getting after it!  This personal time is such a release.  Many of my ideas for work, life, and even this blog come to me while I work out.

Need a work out playlist?  Check out my "gym-flo" mix on Spoitify HERE (note Parental Advisory...these beats may make your booty shake and inspire you to turn into the Incredible Hulk; oh and I like R&B and Hip Hop, so there is some creative usage of the English language).   

Find a way to incorporate physical activity into your weekly calendar.  if you have been lagging behind in this department, be intentional with your time and write it into your schedule, just like you would schedule an important business meeting, or lunch with a friend.

What changes can you make to incorporate physical activity to your daily or weekly routine?  The first year we lived in Lakeland Hills, my longtime friend and neighbor belonged to a gym 9 minutes away from our house....I joined and I think I went 5 times all year.  I opted to work out when I traveled or would just go for a jog occasionally when home.  A year later, I realized I wasn't incorporating enough weight lifting into my routine.  I switched my gym membership to Tahoma Fitness, which is literally across the street from my house.  It's $20 more expensive than my old gym, which is why I joined the other one...but that one change drastically increased the frequency I workout.  How I feel and the mental and physical results significantly out-weigh the extra dollars spent.  What's the one thing you can change?  You should treat your body and mind the same way you should treat your marriage...with commitment, accountability, and make it a priority...oh and it should be fun!  Below are my 5 areas to self-fulfillment - physical fitness being one.

Physical Health & Fitness is one of the 5 areas of self-fulfillment (I'll talk about the other 4 later)

 If you don't belong to a gym, come up with a physical activity plan that works for you.  You don't need to work out for 2 hours to be effective.  Studies have shown that 15 minutes per day, increases mental and physical health.  If you don't know much about how to exercise, the internet is a great place to start for ideas, or what I recommend is reaching out to a few people you know who workout in a way you think aligns with your needs and pick their brain.  You could always sign up for a personal trainer for a few sessions to help get you started.  Reach out to a friend and go in to this journy of fitness together.  Teamwork makes the dream work!  Having someone to help hold you accountable, might be the x-factor of making fitness a habit.  Trust me, take action...your physical and mental health will be well worth the investment.

Need a quick workout?  Check out my favorite on the go exercise routine...takes only 10 minutes!

TAKE ACTION

Clear Focus of What You Want + Action + Consistency = Results

The more and more I study topics of change, enhancing one's mindset, and self improvement, I've been drawn to one common denominator....HABITS.  Self help guru Tony Robbins calls them "rituals," others call them your routine or pattern...whatever it is you want to call them, the daily decisions you make determine your destiny...ooh I like that, I think I'll say it again, but with more oomph!

Your daily decisions determine your destiny!

We all wake up each day with an unspeakable power...no matter how much money you make, where you live, your education, your background, or your circumstance, we all have the power to choose.  The difference between those at the top versus those who are average or living in scarcity, is the people who have extreme success are willing to do what others are not. 

During my time as a student-athlete at WSU, we had several signs up in the weight room to motivate us.  The only one I remember said this:

There are two pains in life: 

1. PAIN OF REGRET, or 2. PAIN OF HARD WORK.

There are few things in life that sting more that the agony and life sucking pain of regret.  So, what's the alternative?  Making the decision to go all-in and go for it is the only way.  Hard work might sound a little harsh for some of you...if you are one of those people, substitute the term hard work with the word "discipline".  Often times we don't have to work harder, but smarter.  Working hard is great, but if it doesn't align with a specific plan, you won't get very far.  For example, you can be busting your butt raking leaves for hours, but if its a windy day, you won't get much accomplished.  We need to work hard AND smart. 

Here's the deal, if you have a laser focus of what you want, you've set a goal, and this goal creates excitement, passion, purpose, and brings out the lion inside you....your actions will not feel like hard work.  You will be consumed by this energy and drive to reach what it is you want.  But, ah, here lies the challenge, have you taken the time to sit down and really think about what it is that you want in life...what are your dreams...and what is it that will bring you the utmost joy?  

What is your God given gift?  We all have that something unique inside of us.  Are you living in your gift?  Take a moment and think about that right now...what is it that will bring you complete joy, satisfaction, and a sense of total achievement?...write it down.  Now what actions do you need to take to make this a reality?  Grab a piece of paper and make two headings like this below.  Fill both sides out.  Start with just 1 or 2 actions to get started.  Once you've mastered those, add another.  Start to build new habits that will lead you to your ultimate goal...the true champion inside of you.

Remember to set a date next to your dream on when you want to accomplish this.  Goals are simply dreams with a deadline.  Don't settle and say you are too old, too young, or the timing is off.  Start today, what you'll wish you started a year from now...five years, ten years from now.  You will never truly live unless you step outside your comfort zone.  

Here's the thing about habits...they are sneaky little devils.  Procrastination is like a slow forming cancer...you don't recognize it until its too late and its spread all over your body.  This disease of putting things off makes you feel like you are too far behind and it paralyzes you.  Multi-billionaire Warren Buffet once said that the habit of procrastination creates chains that cannot be felt, and over time become too hard to break.

My man Warren B. knows the power of habits.

So many people are not looking at the big picture.  They sacrifice long term gain for short term pleasure (going the easy route).  We need to think and make our decisions with the end in mind.  Kendra and I try to parent this way.  A short term sacrifice, we believe will produce a long term gain for our children and their behavior (we are a work in progress here).

Today is the day that you choose to make a new habit.  Maybe its exercising more, quitting smoking, being a better spouse or parent, completing a major task that you've been putting off, or going after that job you always wanted.  When making your decisions you can focus on one of two things: the pain or the pleasure.  Many people chose to focus on the pain instead of the pleasure that the results create.  Make the decision to switch your mindset and focus on how great you will feel after you attack your goal. 

Take exercising for example.  Advertise to yourself how amazing you will feel by working out 4 days a week, how much better you'll look in those pants (hey, summer is just around the corner).  Focus on those pleasures instead of the pain of getting up an hour earlier, of driving to the gym, paying the membership fees, and putting your body through hell.  Overtime these habits and routines will create a sense of ultimate satisfaction and joy...over time you'll see the results and crave to do what you once put off. 

Prioritize your dreams...no one else will do it for you.  You owe it to yourself.  The clock is ticking...the time to take action is NOW!  Please, please, please check out this article on the important habits you should try to instill in your daily routine...the most successful people in world have...you have what it takes to be one of these people.  Good luck!

13 Habits of Self-Made Millionaires